Friday, November 11, 2011

So…



It has been a long time since I wrote something on here. It is not that I have had nothing to write about. In fact a lot has been going on in my life. But for some strange reason I have not had the inclination to write about it on here because it has been too painful.  14 years ago I lost someone close to me and I thought I would never experience pain as bad as that. But it seems I was wrong. Maybe over the years I have gone soft.  Metaphorically that is because I have grown soft literally. Or pain is pain and after a certain point you can’t feel a difference regardless of the degree. I don’t know. Once again I lost someone close to me and it bloody hurts.
In Eat Pray Love the book it says to forget someone you deeply care for you need to go to someplace far away from that person. That’s exactly what I want to do sometimes. Just drop everything and runaway. Get out and forget everything. But sadly that is easier said than done. There is a huge roadblock blocking my way. A 16 letter word which says Responsibilities!!!! Thank goodness for my partner in pain RC and Eckhart Tolle without who I would have definitely gone over the edge.

3 comments:

Lady divine said...

oh dear...

sometimes, history has a way of repeating itself at unexpected times...in different ways.. and Life is called a cycle for many reasons..

I can only hope that the pain would ease, soon, for you..

Take care.

Big Hug.

Scrumps said...

Oh wow CJ.

I'm sorry that you're having to go through something that's upsetting. You have offered me countless good advice through all my tough times. I unfortunately have nowords ot give you. But please know if you ever need someone to talk to, I'm only an email away. And even though I didn't believe it at the time, things do get easier with time.... Just something take a lot of time.

hugs

cj said...

Am sorry for responding so late but I could not get onto this page till now.
LD: Ty for your kind comments I remember I commented on one of your posts about life being cyclical and you are right. The last cycle ended in absolute disaster. Though in retrospect it was the best thing which happened to me. This time the cycle was broken. Even though it is painful. The outcome is yet to be seen. And as someone says time is the great healer.
Scrumps: Thank you so much for your kind offer. And your words. It really fills my heart with joy to realize my comments on your posts had been considered as good advice.