Lionel felt an urge… He had been feeling a tremendous pressure building up inside him for the last couple of weeks and he knew that if he did not do something about it he would get quite ill. He decided that Saturday night was a good night to seek a solution to his problems and he took himself off to The Exchange. Lionel had read about The Exchange in classified section of the Hustler, a magazine which he had a subscription to. He would often scour the classifieds wondering if there was anything that would attract him and as he made his way through the seedy back streets of Elephant and Castle he made a mental note to reknew his subscription to the Hustler.
As Lionel pounded the streets of Elephant and Castle he found himself wishing he was indulging in another kind of pounding and he felt the pressure inside him intensify more. Soon he was at the front door of The Exchange. There was a big burly suit clad minder who frisked Lionel. There was some initial confusion as to whether Lionel was carrying a truncheon in his trouser but the Bouncer soon discovered that it was not a truncheon more a sign of the excitement Lionel was experiencing at the thought of visiting The Exchange.
Soon he was inside the dimly lit club. The red walls lent an air of a Amsterdam Whorehouse while the males and females wondering around in a semi naked state made Lionel feel that he had come to the right place. After downing four straight 50ml shots of Vodka Lionel felt a haze of happiness envelope him. With hay abandon he stripped off to his boxers and then groaned silently when he noticed a small rip in his pants… Damn it his mum must have forgotten to darn it. Lionel at the age of 45 still lived in the family home and his mum did everything for him.
As he walked from room to room Lionel saw a woman – She was black and solidly built. She was tall and firmly built. She was in a tight mini skirt with a blouse that showed off her large firm breasts. Lionel took a long hard look at her and immediately wanted to burry his head afro and all in her welcoming bossom. After making small talk with the woman they decided that they would go to the next level of the club and soon booked a room. The excitement was palpable… Lionel was in ecstasy for soon he would be riding this woman like a Texan cowboy about to lasso a cow. As the woman walked to the bed and lay down Lionel followed . He watched her as she lay on the bed spread-eagled. The excitement was palpable he felt like a pressure cooker about to let off steam. Lionel was about to join her when he felt a warm trickle go down his leg…. Damn it fuck it he cursed as he felt his liquids against his leg… In all the excitement he had forgotten that he suffered from premature ejaculation!
Please note that this is not written by me but by a friend who I think should start her own blog. But will not listen to me as she believes no one is interested in what she has to say. Therefore I have published a humorous short story which she has written without her permission hoping that if she gets some good reviews it would galvanize her into action.